How Ya' Feeling…

Hot, Hot, HOT! It's July and Calgary is Cookin'. Too hot to Knit (my X use to say too hot to do something else but we won't talk about that). It's sleeping in undies and a tank top with no covers and the fan going full blast weather. Even the dog is too hot to move.

I took the boy to "Pirates of the Caribbean II" just to enjoy the air conditioning in the theatre. We had a good storm today, cooled things off a little bit but not much. Took the boy to Sun and Salsa, we went early so we were heading home when it really got crowded. "Twist of Fate" had a booth with hand dyed yarn. As soon as my son saw it, he started trying to pull me away. The owner called him "A Force of Nature", I said "No, he just knows what I'm like around yarn".

Soon the boy goes to visit his Dad in Ontario. He's not keen on going but I hope for both their sakes it goes well. I've blogged about my X and the transformation I underwent when he left here. At this point, the only thing I still haven't forgiven him for is moving so darn far away. Last year, the boy went out to ON and they spent a whopping 10 days together (the boy came home and said he would never go back again), it was even less the year before. I wrote my X asking him to spend as much time with our son as he could this Summer and he came up with 3 weeks. 3 weeks!!! I don't understand. Doesn't he get that his son is slipping away from him… turning away… and he's just letting it happen! I understand that my X wasn't happy with me, and at one point in my life, I loved him enough that I honestly hope he is happier now but why did he move so far away from his only child? I know he loves his son, it doesn't make sense to me. I am crossing all my fingers and toes that the visit goes well and that they rekindle what they use to have.


Know what I'll be doing when the boy is gone… Knitting. Lots and lots of knitting. If it ever cools down. I had new knitting but I frogged it. I am almost finished my ribbon shell… just needs some sewing and blocking and its tafeta ribbon.

I also have a trip in August. I am heading out to BC for a memorial service. I wanted to write about my Aunt Betty. She was a central influence growing up and had more to do with the person I am today than anyone else. I could tell her anything. She was my Mom's best friend. She was there when my Mom was sick, she was there when I went through my divorce, she was there when my best friend went through her divorce (I'm not sure what she said but they spoke on the phone and it helped), she even taught me to knit when I was 13 years old (not that I appreciated it at the time) she has always been there. Always. And now she isn't. I feel like there is something I should say and words entirely fail me. I feel like I should be sobbing inconsolably and I'm not. May be because I took the time to tell her how I felt before she got too sick. She knew how much I loved her, she always knew. My heart is breaking for my Dad, and my cousin but there isn't anything left to say… except goodbye.

Kids!!

SO I can now wear my 12-year-old son's cloths. There's a concept. I bought him a totally cool jacket and it fits me perfectly! His shorts fit me too. He's doing this whole revolutionary look, he has his Fidel hat (with a pin my dad brought back from Russia on it) and of course the green cotton boarding hat, an army surplus jacket, army green pants and shorts and an assortment of vintagy T-shirts and Tank tops in shades of black, grey, washed out yellow and any kind of green with peace doves anti-war slogans and that sort of thing on them, I tried to round up my Bob Marley T-shirt from when I was 17, It's around here somewhere. All he needs now is a Che Guevara or may be a Mao shirt and he's good to go. Note: I don't think it's a coincidence that the colours of his rugby team are green, grey and black, and a touch of red in the logo--even rugby fits into his chosen colour scheme.

I get such a kick out of watching my son transform from Child to Teen. He's totally into the music I was listening to when I was 20, he LOVES The Clash, Faith No More, The Specials, The Police, Early U2 (and as for modern bands, his favourite bands are Green Day and REM). HIs favourite CD is the "Grosse Point Blank" soundtrack. That early to mid-80's sound. I like that he's developing a quirky fashion sense and a pro environment, anti-establishment attitude. I have lots of friends who have Teenage kids and it's fascinating watching them develop, some kids do the Goth thing, some go the Tatoos and Piercings Skater (or is that Sk8R) look, then there are the lucky few who's kids just dress in your basic Jeans and T-shirts. It seems like the more conservative the parents are the more out there the kids go and vice versa, my one girlfriend who was a "wild thing" has the most conservative daughter and my most conservative girlfriend has a teenager who's gone totally Goth. I use to dye everything I owned black (it's what 6 years of Art College will do to you) so my son is mid-line as far as I'm concerned.

The boy is off to camp for a week (why I've been taking more note than usual of how his wardrobe is developing--I had to help him pack). I'll miss him but boy I am looking forward to it. A house that stays clean, eating cereal for dinner if I don't feel like cooking, all that uninterrupted knitting and reading time! He comes back for a week goes back to camp for a 2nd week and come August, he heads off to St. Catherine's ON to visit his Dad for a whole 3 weeks!! The longest he's ever been away. I think it'll be good but weird. He gets back just in time for school.

Yarn Rampage…

Bad, bad me… I went to Make One. I love Make One, I want to live there… but every time I go there, I loose my mind!!! the plan was to buy this pattern. Instead I bought this pattern… this yarn three skeins of it in "Lavender" to make it… sock yarn (my son wants green socks)… Art Yarns one skein of varigated kiwi green silk mohair and 2 balls of kid Merino in fog green with which to make the mult-layered tube shawl out of "Alterknits" I plan to do three wide stripes 1 of fog green kid merino, 1 of Art Yarns handpainted and another stripe of fog green kid merino and my last purchase, a wool bag from knowknits. And I am giving careful consideration to taking a spinning class oh bad, bad. Talk about blowing the budget.

While I was on my yarn rampage yesterday, I left the back of my ribbon shell in Make One… I went back today to pick it up and there it was lying neatly spread out on the coffee table in the middle of the room. I had awful visions of my knitting being critiqued in my absence. I may be happy with it but what if it's uneven… what if the decreases are not as they should be… what if its… bad? It was a little disconcerting.

Today was the crusher's final rugby tournament. It was a scorching hot day. I think I got a touch of heat stroke. I've spent most of the afternoon lying with a cold compress on my forehead.

I am quite proud of the boy, he negotiated himself a part-time job at the local corner store, a few afternoons a week cleaning and stocking shelves and they pay him minimum wage. I could never have done that at 12-1/2 but he did it all by himself. Good on him!

There's more to life than reading?

In my previously mentioned internet/ hanger deprived state, I have been occupying myself with knitting, swimming at the two nearby outdoor pools (with afore-mentioned lifeguard ogling) walking in the park and reading.

Everyone likes a heads up on a great read (at least everyone I know) and added to the last list of books I posted, and "The Kite Runner" here are a couple of books that I've loved recently. The first is "A Perfect Night to Go to China" it's by David Gilmour (a CBC regular) and was a Governor General's Award winner. It isn't long but it is profoundly moving and emotional. I had picked it for my book group next year without having read it. Now I can whole heartedly recommend it. Ladies, It'll break your heart! The second book I've been reading is "Broken for You" by an American writer Stephanie Kallos. It's a book about family lost and found and is warm and wonderful. The characters are vivid and eccentric and you really, really want to know them better. In some ways her writing style reminds me a bit of Constance Beresford-Howe (she wrote "A Serious Widow" and "The Book of Eve") those finely drawn eccentric characters. It was a staff pick at Pages in Kensington and they never steer me wrong. I also picked up "Saturday" by Ian McEwan. I've read his books "Atonement" and "The Black Dog" they are not easy books but they are interesting and his writing style is gorgeous. I am looking forward to reading "Saturday" as well.

I am always looking for recommendations from others as well so if you have something you've read and loved… pass it on!