Sunday, December 17, 2006

Reflections…


As the new year (and another birthday) approach. I am reflecting on a couple of things… why do I knit and… why do I blog. I got into a conversation about this at my LYS. Karen said she reads my blog and she found it through Suzen who also reads my blog. OK, I know people actually do read my blog, but it never ceases to surprise me.

Blogging came from knitting but honestly, both came out of the fact that I live alone with my son.

My son is the best thing that ever happened to me, he is nearly 13, nearly as tall as I am, tough, "the crusher" as his rugby coach named him, he is also bright, learning disabled and ADD. He can be a difficult haul sometimes. He can be… overwhelming. He does the most random things that make total sense to him but drive me mad. Like last week… he decided he wasn't going to school any more… in grade 7 he decided that school "sucked" and he'd had enough. He outweighs me… I can't physically force him to go if he doesn't want to. We eventually got it sorted out, the school guidance counsellor, his teachers, the vice principal, they've all been very supportive in what has been, to say the least, a trying week.

I've found knitting as the ultimate form of stress relief. I can loose myself in knitting, the yarns, the colours, the patterns… all that potential. It's endlessly enchanting. I can loose myself, yet still be there for my son, in the same room, sitting side by side. There but not there if you know what I mean. We can still carry on a conversation, I can answer his questions but from a calmer place.

Blogging came from my enthusiasm for knitting and the other people who blog and knit. Mostly it's a way to share that enthusiasm for knitting and knitters in general. Occasionally I side step into more personal stuff on the blog. Occasionally I NEED to side step into that more personal stuff. It gives me somewhere to put it. To… not to offend anyone… dump it. I write it, hit publish and off it goes… into the great void. It can be easy to forget that it's also the public domain. Then things start drifting back… kind words… support… helpful suggestions…. It's like sending a message in a bottle… you don't know where it's going or who will pick it up but it's addictive. I can't see ever not blogging now that I've found it.

with Christmas so close and me so disorganized ;-D I may need to take a little breather but I hope everyone is enjoying this holiday season.

6 Comments:

Anonymous canknitian said...

So glad you write here!

And so, so glad that you and your son found the support you needed for him at school.

Big hug!

2:09 PM  
Blogger The_Add_Knitter said...

Very nicely put! We all enjoy reading your relfections so much....have a great holiday and good luck with getting organized, I am utterly disorganized as well. My house is a pit and I still have presents to mail, and yes, knitting is a wonderful break from stress, isn't it?

9:39 PM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

Marnie- Blogging is so much fun- you connect with people you otherwise would never have met.
I enjoy reading your blog because you're intelligent, funny, brave and lead a different life from mine. We're all doing the best we can with what we've got.

8:38 AM  
Blogger kittin said...

I know what you mean about sending it off to the void. It makes me *really* think about what I write, but it sure keeps me writing too :)

9:35 AM  
Blogger Lone Knitter said...

I'm not a mother, but I hope to be some day. I have a 15-yr-old sister, and she can be quite a riot sometimes. I feel as if I've had a hand in raising her, and I feel a lot of guilt for things I did or didn't do. I realized after a while that I had to stop blaming myself and that she'll just make her own choices. It's a hard job, but it looks like you're doing it mighty well. I'm so glad you've found knitting and blogger to help calm you.

9:13 PM  
Blogger quiltyknitwit said...

Knitting definitely helps me manage my stress with my son, who also has some challenges. He's wired "differently" and can be a real handful!

10:41 AM  

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